In time for Halloween

The King's New Clothes

Here's what I think about LeBron and his Yankee's cap. I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. It doesn't affect me as a Cavs fan or as an Indians fan. I don't wish ill will on the other people who wore Yankees caps to the Jake so why would I wish it on LeBrick. Shit, its not like he was wearing a Steelers cap.

Now me not caring and there not being a problem with what LeBron did are two different things. With that said, I don't see anything wrong with what Bron did. Plenty of people who live in Cleveland root for other teams (like the Packers), I don't see why its different because LeBron happens to play for the Cavs.

Second the kid is not even from this city, he's from Akron. That's a solid forty minute drive south. If you drive forty minutes east I'm sure you'll find more than your fair share of Stillers fans. Akron is not Cleveland. If it were there'd be a lot more Zips fans. But alas Cleveland is filled with Buckeye fans who have never set foot in Columbus. And why do they choose the Buckeyes over the Zips? One because that's how they were raised and two because the Zips suck.

Now look at LeBron raised in Akron, with no father figure pushing him towards the Cavs, Indians and Browns. Who do kids tend to gravitate towards? Winners that's who. Who was a winner in the early to mid Nineties? Yankees, Bulls and Cowboys.

So not only do I not have a problem with what LeBron did I've got more respect for him. He's a real fan. (He's a douche for rooting for the Yankees, but a fan nonetheless). Everyone who follows the Cavs has known that LeBron is a Yankees fan and wears a Yankees lid all the time. If Bron would have showed up to Game One with a Tribe cap I would have said he's got no back bone. So I give him credit knowing full well that he's going to take heat for it. Now the worst thing that LeBron could do is show up at the ALCS in Tribe gear. That would be sackless.

Music, for a moment

Can you name the artists who claim to have sold more than 1 billion albums? Most people would soon guess the Beatles and be correct, but #2, Elvis Presley? Really? I know the guy was big for a time but again, really? Elvis has sold the 2nd most albums of all time? Who is buying them? You can go to any used cd shop and find a plethora of old Beatles cds & vinyl, but Elvis? Who's listening to him?

Go ahead and so "Ooh, I am!" But no, no you aren't. I guess I can recognize his influence and place in history, but I don't know a single fan of his. Lots of people perk up when they hear his name, but few entertain the idea of actively choosing to listen to his music. This figure, which is found floating around the web in many places, is stated in such a way that it almost looks like one person/site claimed it as fact and others followed suit. Seriously, a billion? 10 million records a year for 100 years? 25 million a year for 40 years? Bullshit, I'm sorry.

The Beatles, sure, I get that. It's still an incredible number, but not unthinkable. So, The Beatles are #1 and Elvis is "#2" (better than calling him "poop", I guess), having surpassed the one billion mark, well Wikipedia, who has sold more than 500 million? Michael Jackson and Frank Sinatra, you say? MJ, eh ok, but Sinatra? Obviously the Chairman has his fans. I'm not taking that, nor his talent, for granted. The thing is, if not for much of today's younger generations trying to make a statement - a stand for crooners when that's what they really were, not bubble gum and poppy metrosexuals - his numbers wouldn't be so inflated.

Alla Pugacheva, Nana Mouskouri, Cliff Richard and Tino Rosso - ever heard of them? Well they've sold 250+ million. Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, Queen(!), Rod Stewart (?), Julio Iglesias, Elton John, ABBA and Bing Crosby have also accomplished the feat. 4 of my all time favorite artists are in this group, so I've got no qualms about liking "popular" artists, but to me, these are the classics; the guys/artists that molded music into the defining factor for generations to come.
Ok, one more grouping: more than 100 million records sold. Looks like at least 66 in this grouping. What's more surprising; the lack of acts like Simon & Garfunkel, Jimi Hendrix, The Doors, Metallica, Bob Marley or the presence of Celine Dion, Cher, the Scorpions and Mariah Carey?

Want to vomit? This should do it. Look at some of the names between 50-75 million albums sold. The Corrs? Enya? Shakira? She couldn't even speak English when she recorded her first album! ARGH!

Obviously (well it should be, at least), record sales don't translate to quality of music. I've seen plenty of bands who will never make it big that I personally find exponentionally more enjoyable and talented than most some broad who slides into leather pants and implores you to check our her hips, which allegedly will not mislead you.

All figures are acquired from Wikipedia and some may have even been backed up by other sources. Research, wooo!

No Hope for the Brownies

Forget what you've heard about Brady Quinn providing a spark for this offense. I'm not a Browns fan, so this doesnt bother me one bit. Anyone who knows me, or has talked to me about Brady Quinn knows how I feel about him.

Even if I'm wrong about him, how can he help this team forget that they paid a future first rounder for his services? This team has a lot of problems, and they arent getting any better.

Here are the facts. Unless Brady Quinn can add A LOT of weight and play on the defensive front to help these guys stop the run, he cant help this team. After three games, only the Bills have surrendered more rushing yards than the Browns.

The Browns have given up 529 rushing yards over three games, an average of just over 176 yards per game, and nearly five yards per carry. If you cant stop the run, you cannot win games. The Indianapolis Colts were the exception during the regular season last year, not the rule. They also had and still have a much better offense, but thats neither here nor there.

Next year, when April rolls around, what will Browns fans have to get excited about? Their pick in the top five or top ten?? Woops. Now, instead of drafting a defensive stud to help that AWFUL run defense, they'll have to wait until the second round to see what pops up.

Bottom line, if they dont find a way to stop teams from running the ball down their throats, they'll have no leg to stand on, no matter how early they may pick in the second round. Even if Brady Quinn does provide ANY kind of spark on offense, he still cant help that defensive front which has been on hits heels all year long.

If you are a Browns fan, do you still have any kind of hope that this will get better? If you do, then good luck, you are more faithful than me.

Check out my random thoughts at www.blogginwithbull.blogspot.com. Also check out my picks on www.hammondbacon.blogspot.com and see my interview with Zach Baker at www.vitaminz.blogspot.com. Thanks for reading.

who calls this football?

The entire world apparently. Not to make this into a soccer blog or anything, but the topic came up so here goes. Soccer is mildly intriguing to me, in the same way that car accidents are intriguing to passersby. I know abit about soccer, most of the rules, some of the players(the best player in the world is KaKa, for real that's his name) some of the teams, etc. I even watched an MLS game when Becks played for the Galaxy once. With all that said I don't like soccer. I gave it a shot and still found it mind numbingly boring. I'm not gonna say its not a sport, it is, but it is a boring sport. Maybe I just don't get the intricacies of the game. Maybe its because I wasn't brought up watching it. (Have you ever sat with an adult who is watching their first baseball game? Its probably excruciatingly boring for them.)

Here's what I find lacking with the sport. (Not that it matters, but what does). The action is sparse, most of the game is a back and forth that occurs in the middle third of the pitch (field for you Americans). Its not like hockey where there is constant pressure on the goalie (compare shots on goal in each sport). Unless the Brazilians are playing there is hardly ever constant attacks on the keeper.

Wait there's how many leagues? Excluding the MLS, which is kinda like women's football in comparison, there are maybe dozens of top flight professional soccer leagues. There's the English Premier League with recognizable clubs like Chelsea, Manchester United and Aston Villa (owned by Randy Lerner). There's the Spanish league with Barcelona and Real Madrid. There's the Italian leagues with Inter Milan and AC Milan. And I'm sure there's more leagues in Germany and some of the Baltic countries.

Here's where the problem lies, how do we know which team is best. We kinda do but we don't. Each league crowns its own champ but teams from different leagues do play each other. Now, I don't know what the difference is between the UEFA Cup and the Champions League is but the best teams from the major leagues do play each other and name a champ. I guess that kinda works.

Now if I wanted to know who was the best basketball team in the world was all I had to do was watch the Spurs dismantle the Cavs. There is, without question, no better basketball team in the world right now than the Spurs. Not in Canada, not in the U.S. and not in any of the Euro Leagues. All the best players play in one league I'm not sure you can say that about soccer.

Finally some of the rules are absurd. Well I guess some of the rules in every league are absurd.(fumble that goes out the endzone, belongs to the other team and counts as a touchback. What!?) What's the deal with the clock in a soccer match? Why doesn't it stop? We time sprinters to the hundredth of a second and we can't stop the clock in a soccer match. This in turns leads to "injury time". Imagine if a football game didn't end when the buzzer sounded but after the official added an amount of time that only he knew about. That's INSANE! Not only does this not make any sense, it sucks the drama out of the waning minutes of a game and its ripe for fixing. So Stop the clock!

I'm sure there's more. I tried to watch it, it didn't work I'm sorry. It still intrigues me just not enough to really care. Go USA women's world cup team!

Road trippin'

What's this?


Well, yea it's corn, but what's it doing here? Let's try again.
Ok, what's this?

You'd better know where that pic is.
How about:


Really, if you don't know that picture, you don't belong here (or anywhere for that matter). One more chance:

BAM!

I finally made it to the Field Of Dreams in Dyersville, Iowa! If you're a baseball/Field Of Dreams fan, then there's really no excuse for not making the trip out to see the movie site, which still exists in perfect condition, just as you remember it from the movie, except for the fact that in late September, the corn is a bit brown. Ok fine, there's one excuse for not going: it's Iowa. Really, has anyone here ever been to Iowa? If you think there's a lot of corn along Rt. 6 leading into BG, you ain't seen nothing yet. True story, Iowa's 2 biggest exports: corn and the smell of cow shit.

My plan for the trip was to drop my girl at the Minneapolis/St Paul airport at 5:30pm and start the drive down, camp, and finish the drive in the morn', following the Mississippi River most of the way. Well, after an amazing sunset drive along the river, I got to my expected campground around 9 or so. Well, seeing as it was a Sunday night and business is a bit, er, slow (or nonexistent, the lady laughed at me when I'd called to reserve a site) I was the only camper when I arrived. As I got out of my truck to grab a permit, one Ursus americanus walked right in front of my car... No pictures exist as I froze where I stood.

The common practice for dealing with black bears is to make yourself look large and make some noise to scare it off. Right. You draw as much attention to yourself as possible when there's a bear 50 feet away and not another human for miles, I'll be right behind you. By the time I finally exhaled and moved again, the bear probably figured I was dead and not a worthy opponent. Look, I've been fairly close to bears before, on the AT, but when there isn't another person for miles, it's pretty easy to lose your nerve around something 3-4 times your size with claws.

Moving on, the next day, I drove from La Crosse, Wisconsin to Prarie Du Chien, WI (not a chance you're pronouncing that correctly) and into Iowa. The drive down Wisconsin was a bit distracting; just to my right was the Mississippi, and man, it's HUGE! Seriously, even Rocky Colavito would've needed to string together 7-8 good throws to clear the river. I took some pics from the side of the river and also some from 500+ feet up. The magnitude of the Mississippi is ridiculous compared to the Cuyahoga, you know it's bigger, but until you're actually there, you have no idea.

After crossing into Iowa and driving past nothing but cornfields, horses and cows for hours, one passes New Vienna ("The eNVy of Iowa"), about 4 miles before the turnoff for the FOD site. After the turn, you're still 3 miles short and the goosebumps which overtook your arms hours ago are staking claim to your legs and making your chest sweat like George Costanzo eating Kung Pao.

Finally, there it is: besides the HOF, Wrigley & Fenway, quite possibly the most sacred site still accessible to baseball fans today: The Field of Dreams. There's nothing around for miles; no highway, very few people, but suddenly, the setting for the climactic scene of the movie:


There were people from Texas, Illinois and PA there, playing catch or just taking pictures. Thinking, "Well, it's the Field Of Dreams, how do you come here and not play catch?" I had my glove. As soon as I set foot on the grass I realized my error: you don't play catch with just any stranger here. This is a place fathers and sons visit, hell even close friends. But playing catch with some kid from Texas just because he also has cow skin sewed around his fingers? I don't think so. Again, sacred.

Eventually I left, but not before savoring every possible second I could from that place. Even though it's simply a baseball diamond in the middle of bumfuck Iowa and no bigger than most High School diamonds, there's a feeling that if you leave now, something big is going to happen as soon as you're gone and you'll miss it. The field calls out, begging, "Don't go. Sit a couple more moments; we built it, you came, share the beauty, share the joy. 'Live the magic, Have faith in simplicity, and Always dare to dream.'"

Perhaps the biggest shock of the entire day? At the field was a register for all the tourists to sign (registers are something with which I've become very familiar, after my time on the AT), and the pen waiting to be used by all? A Tri-C pen. That's right, a Cuyahoga Community College pen sitting at the the Field of Dreams in Dyersville, Iowa! I laughed aloud.

I really don't know how to end this post; since the movie came out in '89, I realized that a trip to the site was a requisite in my lifetime. Yet, on arrival, I realized I'd forgotten the most important factor, my father. It's like winning the lottery but then finding out that socialism has finally won out and money isn't worth anything anymore. I'm lost. Sorry.

What to do?

Your whole life, you've been brought up following baseball, football and basketball (some of you hockey as well), thinking that the 3 major sports are the only ones that really matter. Then, something happens... you start dating someone who participated in a sport not included amongst the 'real' ones.

Sure, golf, car racing, poker, if you told me that someone's participation in these events makes them an athlete, I'd laugh at you and dismiss pretty much everything else you'd tell me. Not only are these things boring, but they take no athleticism whatsoever. But then, someone has to bring up soccer. Fuck!

Look, I'm aware that soccer is the most popular sport in the world, but that doesn't mean squat to me - I like what I like. Sorry, but all those signs in my grade school classrooms must have left an impression; "What's popular isn't always right, what's right isn't always popular." Goddamn right, Garfield!

So fine, from birth into my mid-20's I find soccer boring, pointless and silly. Then, all of a sudden, I find myself involved with someone who played soccer at a higher level than anyone I know personally has played a sport. All this pointless running up and down a spacious field has obviously helped sculpt her into a fascinatingly athletic individual who doesn't know when to say "No" (or rather, "No, this is pointless"). But damn, it's soccer!

So my dilemma is this: I must, for the first time, admit soccer must be a sport, yet I still don't enjoy it. Does my predisposition towards a dislike of soccer lead to some disagreements about the level of athletes in certain sports? Of course, but that's just because she doesn't "understand baseball". Is it my fault that soccer players are useless with their hands?